Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Saru is awesomely godlike-

Image hosted by
Listening: Mizuki Nana - Dancing in the velvet moon
Reading: Fullmetal Alchemist Chapter 102

... because she is made in the image of God. =3

I saw the coloured scenes that I painstakingly animated. It looked awesome~ I must post it when our group finishes it.

And neeways, the final assignment for Photoshop class. I'm in the "ahh-screw-you-and-your-shitty-montage-methods" mode. I just want to paint something I like that looks nice, even if it is not whatever you want. (The usual: click for bigger.)


3D, also, was a mess. (God, I pray that we have saner lecturers next sem.)

I don't know why, but my Photoshop is lagshit today. Blast it. Something with colour profiles.

Tuesday, December 15, 2009

stress drawings

Image hosted by
Listening: Bentley Jones - His World (Blue World Prelude)
Watching: Photoshop CS 2

It's the final week of Fall 2009!

Image Hosted by

Image Hosted by

Wednesday, December 09, 2009

this is some unrecognizable fanart

Image hosted by
Listening: Nico Nico Chorus (Tarou, Piko & Be~e~eju) - Uninstall

Something like the Hong Kong comic style...?

Image Hosted by

Image Hosted by

Monday, December 07, 2009

pretty church paper is pretty

Image hosted by
Listening: Higurashi no Naku Koro ni - You
Reading: Ikigami Chapter 16 - 18

Image Hosted by

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

most painful piece of vector i've ever done

Image hosted by
Watching: Dilip Chaubey mutating Barack Obama with Photoshop

... and hopefully, things will get less painful. Since I will get better. Hur.

It was an assigment: draw a full body portrait of a pirate. Or something. Tikam background is tikam, done in less than half an hour. The character herself? Hmmm, was it two or three days?

I super love the face. It looks like a profile pic for a character in a game doesn't it?

Saturday, November 21, 2009


Image hosted by
Listening: Alstroemeria Records feat. nomico - Bad Apple

I miss them.

Wednesday, November 04, 2009

i am still immature it seems

Image hosted by
Listening: Don Moen - God Will Make A Way
Reading: Berserk Chapter 303

There are a lot of things I don't understand. That much I am aware of.

I don't understand how his methods are any better than what I have been doing. Maybe that's why I didn't listen. I don't mean any form of disrespect. I just did not understand that he wanted us to do it his way.

His talked about my midterms. If only he knew. I know I was slacking. But, I'm not that good of a DPS-er. Despite that, I had to raid solo. I attacked, I buffed, I tanked alone. There is only so much a weak player can take. It wasn't the right time to heal up at the fountain, I wanted to do that anyway.

This monkey is fond of escapism, this much I am aware of.

Monday, November 02, 2009

i am not thinking of what i seem to be thinking of

Image hosted by
Reading: Hourou Musuko Volume 1

Yesterday, our kids didn't come yet. So I played with the normal kids. They like me a lot. One girl asked "Jie jie which group are you from?"

I AM NOT THINKING THAT MY SN KIDS ARE UNCUTE. I am definitely not thinking that normal kids are better than SN kids.

Thursday, October 29, 2009

mood swing

Image hosted by
Listening: 周迅 - 外面

It is troublesome being a female.

But then again, given how I like to touch people, I guess it is a good thing. Guys that touch girls are perverts, and guys that touch other guys are gay.

So thank you, God, that I am female. Even though there are headaches and cramps and mood swings now.

is a machine because...

Image hosted by
Listening: Satou Tenpei - Lord Laharl's Hymn
Reading: Sengoku Youko Chapter 21 & 22

The one man supermachine, is a machine because it cannot communicate well with humans. It also seems to run on Vista since it is unable to function well when given too many tasks to perform at a go.

Life Drawing
Animal Anatomy
2D Raster Graphics
Intro to 3D
Most of the people in class got As. I was upset being the solo tanker, so I did not do so well. But that just means that I suck. Because I am not the only solo tanker in class.

Sunday, October 25, 2009

i so love the church bulletin paper

Image hosted by
Listening: Disgaea BGM09 - Elegant Demons
Playing: Disgaea: Afternoon of Darkness

I missed Yee's first time leading worship because of cell group. Then I missed Kenneth's birthday because I was with Yee at service. I missed Auntie's Stephanie's wedding because of schoolwork.

Maybe I am just a bastard.

(Too many events and quests take place during the same chapter!)

Saturday, October 24, 2009

starting next year, I have one more person to claim ang pao from

Image hosted by
Random Quote: It is my honour to have you, brother! - Auntie Stephanie
             I have been waiting for this a loooong time :) - Dad

And since I won't be there, this is the wedding gift.

Tuesday, October 20, 2009

peacefully unwrapping UVs on a Tuesday morning

Image hosted by
Listening: the soft whirling of my CPU
Watching: M@ya 8.5
God is good All the time
He put a song of praise
In this heart of mine
God is good All the time
Through the darkest night
His light will shine
God is good All the time
God is good

If you're walking through the valley
There are shadows all around
Do no fear He will guide you
He will keep you safe and sound
He has promised to never leave you
Nor forsake you
And His Word is true

God is good All the time
He put a song of praise
In this heart of mine
God is good All the time
Through the darkest night
His light will shine
God is good All the time
God is good

We were sinners so unworthy
Still for us He chose to die
He filled us with His Holy Spirit
Now we can stand and testify
That His love is everlasting
And His mercies they will never end

God is good All the time
He put a song of praise
In this heart of mine
God is good All the time
Through the darkest night
His light will shine
God is good All the time
God is good
God is good

On an unrelated note, I am fully supportive of a "CHOP-IT-OFF" regime. For all the unfaithful men out there.

Friday, October 16, 2009

Mortal Life is a horrible game

Image hosted by
Listening: Praise Band - I Walk By Faith
Reading: my email

The tutorial mode is hard to understand and does not cover much. The UI is terribly difficult to navigate through. The gameplay is tiresome and boring. The minimap is non-existant. Equipment slots are limited. Your inventory malfunctions way too often. The common job classes overlap way too much and require too many confusing stat buildups. The elite job classes: ppffft... Those are randomly assigned when you create your character. Many quests give you more exasperation than experience points, and even lesser gold.

Way too much player interactivity - the bane of solo players - is required.

One thing I give it credit though: Random events are varied, and infinite possible routes are available based on the choices the player makes. Adrenaline and pressure, guaranteed.

This game sucks. I can't wait to die and logout.

But then again, the Game Master is the one who decides who he wishes to banhammer. If you're going to do this to us, Game Master, could you upgrade the tutorial mode? Or teach me how to use the support hotline. I don't know how to continue playing this for another 50 years.

It is a selfish request, but I pray: Give me banhammer. Please

Wednesday, October 07, 2009

oil in my lamp

Image hosted by
Listening: BoA feat. VERBAL - BUMP BUMP!

Maybe it's God's way of speaking to me. When I woke up today, I heard this tune. After a while, I remembered what song was it.
Give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning
Give me oil in my lamp, I pray
Give me oil in my lamp, keep me burning
Keep me burning 'til the break of day

Give me joy in my heart, keep me praising
Give me joy in my heart, I pray
Give me joy in my heart, keep me praising
Keep me praising 'til the break of day

'kay, Polo Club now.

Sunday, October 04, 2009

saru makes a good mother

Image hosted by
Listening: Starfield - From The Corners Of The Earth
Watching: Adobe Illustrator 12 (AKA CS2)
Random Quote: "Wow Joelynn will make a good parent. Okay, you are ready to get a boyfriend now." - Dad

I say that because of the other mothers I have seen. I don't know how on earth a six-year-old boy can win an argument with his mom, or why a mother would cry when her eight-year-old son lies on the floor to throw a tantrum. It just goes to show how much in control these parents are of their children. And these are not random parents I see in public or something. I know them.

If I were to be a mother, I would be like the mother of the tape recorder boy: "You cannot touch girls, no pet pet, no hug hug, no kiss kiss. You cannot touch girls, no pet pet, no hug hug, no kiss kiss. You cannot touch girls, no pet pet... ..." He doesn't know the reason behind these instructions, but he obeys them and repeats them like this anyway.

Speaking of kiss kiss, the reason why tape recorder kept going on repeat was because he was talking to someone whose hormones went on SEED-mode today and kept chasing around a girl to kiss her.

BEST REJECTION EVAR. (Of course, she, being autistic, and only five years old, didn't know anything. It was just wet so she had to wipe it off.)

Friday, October 02, 2009

i give you clouds

Image hosted by
Listening: M.O.V.E. - over drive
Watching: Japher playing Icy Tower

I haven't felt this shiok for a while. A nostalgic feeling. I ticked off a lecturer today. XDD

He taught us to make a cloud brush with Filter > Render > Clouds. I didn't. WhyshouldI,Idon'tseethepoint. Hismethodcanonlypaintfluffycumulusclouds. But just to make sure I have something on screen when he drops by again, here, clouds, painted with Chalk 60 pixel and not his cloud brush. Pffftt.

Yea, I know I am sooo mature. *whine whine whine*

Regarding sunsets and skies, I MISS CHANGI BEACH. Coming May, I will so go there and overnight. But DAMN IT WHY AM I A GIRL.

This week I felt terrible. Because I forgot to take iron pills. *facepalm* Today I feel better, because I started taking them 2 days ago.

Sunday, September 20, 2009

10 Characters, 20 Questions

Image hosted by
Listening: Katy Perry - Hot'n'Cold

I am not slacking... I am de-stressing. My email is being retarded to me.

From here. Using my own original characters... so this post is mostly for my own entertainment. (Randomizer helped me pick out only ten characters. >.<) There there, nothing interesting, move along.
  1. Blaze
  2. David
  3. Mick
  4. Demon Rhys
  5. King Emrys
  6. Artemis
  7. Hawk
  8. Rose Meyrer
  9. Emerson
  10. Celeste

1) Characters 4, 9 and 10 are at an arcade. What game do they choose to play, and who wins?
Rhys, Emerson, Celli. Something the involves punching, since two of the three of them are violent people. Emerson won't play, since he's an A.I. program without body. But I think Celli will win, because Rhys will spoil the machine.

2) Make up an e-mail address for 6.
Art. Alino is her online pseudonym.

3) If 8 had an iPod or some kind of music player, what kinds of songs would you find in it?
Rose. Classical piano ensemble pieces, with all the allegro, vivace and animato. She is a cheerful person.

4) What would you do if 9 suddenly paid you a visit?
Emerson. YES all my computer and programming problems solved! Woohoo! I'll copy him and download him to my comp.

5) Do you think 6 and 4 are made for each other?
Rhys and Art. They make good friends, and Rhys is quite fond of her, but no, he's not stupid enough to touch her. (Her children will kill him.)

6) 1 challenges 3 to a no-holds-barred duel. Who will win and how?
Blaze and Mick. Blaze is way stronger (mweeheehee fire!!), but Mick will win. Because Blaze has a crush on her.

7) 7, 2 and 1 order a pizza. What toppings does each one request, and what do the others think of the choices?
Blaze, David and Hawk. Blaze will ask for a lot of peppers. David will not touch the green peppers. He's autistic, and really hates green. Hawk just eats whatever. He's a jack-of-all-traits man.

8) What subject would 1 teach if s/he were a teacher/professor? Would s/he be good at it?
Rose. Music. Duh, she's a pianist. And she's teach well, because she is old, and kind and really patient.

9) 5 and 10 go on their first date. Where would they go, and what would they do?
Emrys and Celli? (Both girls.) I don't know, they are both not very open people. But being the politician she is, Emrys will probably ask about Celli's life and family and home and etc. Celli will end up talking about her sister, and Emrys might see the similarity between her husband (Rhys) and her.

10) 8 sings karaoke and dedicates a song to 7. What song would s/he dedicate and why?
Rose and Hawk. .... What? Who will want to dedicate a song to that ... ...? Okay, Rose is a nice person, so she'll just sing a lullaby.

11) How would 8 court 6?
Rose and Art. EHHH. She will cook for Art I guess. Art loves food.

12) Describe the relationship between 2 and 8 in the canon. Would you change it? Why?
David and Rose. WHY KEEP USING 8 LAR. Canon is, they have never met it other and never will. Not changing.

13) In your list, who do you think is the perfect match for 3 and why?
Mick. Obviously, I am rooting for Blaze. Go GO GO!!

14) 2 has a dream where 10 tells him/her to save 1, who is facing certain doom. What would 2 do?
David dreams Celli tells him to save Blaze. He does nothing. He doesn't listen to people who he is not familiar with. And he does not have the ability to comprehend death or impending doom.

15) 9 and 6 are about to get married, until 3 crashes their wedding and abducts 9 against his/her will. 6 follows them, but must forge an uneasy alliance with his/her archrival, 1. They must then hijack some form of transportation from 8 in order to get to 3's lair, where they must fight against 3's evil zombified minions. What will happen next?
Emerson and Emrys marrying, Mick crashes...? Emrys must ally with Blaze, and steal transport from Rose. ... ... ... ... Being the pragmatic person, I can imagine Emrys politically marry Emerson for her country or something. AND Mick probably kidnapped Emerson because he is a really useful program to have. Emrys will have no problem approaching Blaze (since she IS a politician and he's pretty much a yes-man). Rose will lend them the transport willingly, because it is fun to see what "kids nowadays" do. In the end, Mick will make a copy of Emerson and everyone is happy. The End. (WTH.)

16) 8 receives a gift from 9. Does s/he open it or not? If so, what is inside?
Rose and Emerson. Rose won't know how to open file attachments. She's not tech-savvy y'know. But her husband probably can. And the file will be something sent by Emerson's master, like a proposal or request or information.

17) 4 is walking home when s/he sees a cute fluffy creature, which promptly begins rubbing itself against his/her legs. Will s/he kick it away, or take it home?
Rhys. He takes it home, and dumps it on Emrys' lap. And she'll be the one looking after it. Tsk, he is that irresponsible.

18) 8 is dared by 4 to strip while pole-dancing in front of 7. Write a short dialogue about this.

19) What smiley/emoticon would best describe 5?
Emrys. ' - ' I don't know. She rarely shows any emotion.

20) If you had the chance to rewrite 1's life, how would you change it?
Blaze. I don't write his life. He lives his own life. I'm just the biographer, not the God. I'm the moderator, not the admin.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Daniel Chien's advice for successful marriages

Image hosted by
Listening: Relient K - Softer to Me

3 "L"s
for the husband
3 "S"s
for the wife

In other news, let's laugh at Malaysia, again. Chilli crab is theirs? Liek real. Kiam par lah. *flame flame flame* This is going to be fun.

Sunday, September 06, 2009

need more STR stats

Image hosted by
Listening: A R Rahman - Jai Ho

*sprouts a chain of vulgarities in english/hokkien/chinese/malay*

I. Am. Irritated.

1 - SN

Today, is probably one of the most hectic days in my serving of the Special Needs kids. Joseph tries to play with the normal kids: they shout "siao arh" at him. Jia Hui is all mine today. Joseph doesn't like sharing me so he pulls my hair and steals my specs three times more often than usual. Shivam screamed about. Chain reaction. Elisha cries/whines loudly. Joshua is about to go off too. Everyone busy with the autistic boys, the ADHD one and the Downs Syndrome one and the girl is left to me. Joash disturbs Jia Hui. Joseph breaks/tears puzzle pieces. Joseph and Joash both climb on me. Jia Hui leaves to find more puzzles. I chase her, Joseph breaks more puzzles. I scold him, he laughs, Joash scolds him.

Bah. Whatever it is, any first-timer to SN will get scared off and swear never to return here.

That's what I really hate about SN. I don't dislike the kids, they are cute =3 But I dislike how other people do not want to serve with them. After being with them for 2 plus years, I can see why. It's hard to the fruits of our labour. Our kids don't respond. They are violent. They are noisy. They don't even acknowledge your existence. The don't seem to get better. They are always as dependent as ever.

I cannot help but think that whenever other leaders look at our corner of screaming, "misbehaving" kids, they think something along the lines of "Thank God our kids are not like that". But guys, we are all women here. We are not that strong. Our boys getting bigger in size, and their hormones are functioning like any normal boy their age, even if their minds do not. What can we do?

God, I need to rely on you for strength. But please, also send some guys our way. We have been asking for guys, for the past years, and some have come, stayed, and left. Others come and left instantly. I am disappointed. I know it is not easy to serve these kids. That's why, God, send someone strong. I petition sincerely.

(On a related note: Divorce rates amongst couples with Special Needs children are really high. And, DUH, it is the mother who ends up raising the children. ALL YOU GUYS HAVE LESS BALLS THAN US GIRLS.)

2 - GB

My timetable changed. Third revision. All my lessons are now in the afternoon. Even if I am able to teleport, I have only 1 hour to spend. So I cannot serve GB anymore.

What, maybe I'm not worthy to be an officer. I'm pretty weak of a person, that much I know.

For now, I'll look forward to carrying my photocopier puzzle-tracked mind girl in two weeks time. Only one day, and I miss GKidz already.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

i had a good early birthday

Image hosted by
Listening: Iwasaki Tarou - SOUL-EATER(SO SCANDALOUS)

Thanks to Junting, Mel, Glory, Hui hui and Kenneth. ^ ^

In a few days, I'll be 21 months old. So says my parents.

Wednesday, August 05, 2009

when i start working

Image hosted by
Listening: Orange Range - Locolotion
Random Quote: Imagination is what drives the world - Some scientist dude in my dream

... I get weird dreams in my sleep. There is an alternative reality in which mechas are piloted by people with great imagination. Because of that, the usually unhealthy DMD-ers are called to become soldiers and pilots. Their imagination and brain waves and sheer will (and SPIRAL ENERGY) is what powers these mechas.

I think I had a dream like that because I really miss the NYP people? Ahahahahaha XDD

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Scholarship Essay ($5000 for 2 semesters)

Image hosted by
Listening: Kirk Franklin/tobyMac - Let It Glow
Reading: needmoney.doc (LOL)

The curriculum at DigiPen Institute of Technology involves rigorous foundational coursework reinforced by a project-based learning approach that allows students to apply their skills and knowledge in an industry-like environment. Describe a time when you have successfully applied something you learned (on your own, from work, or from a class) in a creative, artistic, or academic endeavor.

The first time I learned that colours have emotions was during a Sunday morning, doing my duties in church, through the hands of a 7-year-old boy with Down’s Syndrome. On happy days, Jesus was green and the crippled man was yellow. On sick days, the shepherd was brown and the sheep were blue. On angry tantrum days, Mary was red and infant Jesus was black.

It was an epiphany to find out that there was actually truth and reason behind the colours artists use to symbolize certain emotions to convey the mood of their pieces. It was a real life lesson in colour theory and a teaching in how closely art relates to real life.

Going on this route of an artist and designer has been one of the greatest changing points in my life. I have loved drawing and computers since my childhood, and I choose to not let my passion stay as a hobby, but seek to improve myself by taking a Diploma in Digital Media Design.

Since then, I have become the unofficial marketing director of whatever events that my non-artists friends have planned. I did up posters and websites, in the process of which I learned more about working as a designer.

Recently, I went on a community service trip to Dujiangyan in Sichuan for the survivors of the 2008 earthquake. One of the activities we did was to have the children paint a huge banner, stamping their palm prints on the cloth and writing down their dreams. In preparation for it, I bought poster paints, plates and other materials. On the day itself, I helped in drawing guidelines and markings on the banner and in coordinating the children as to where to print on the banner. Due to the excitement of the children and the sheer number of them, it was slightly chaotic situation, leading to a stressful experience for my group. Thankfully, the banner was completed beautifully in the end without any major problems.

It was only during the debrief that I realized how smooth things went on. There had been two groups assigned to two different camps of temporary housings, and the other group’s banner exercise had been more chaotic than ours. Both groups were very grateful for my advice and guidance as we realized that the banner exercise would not have been that successful. (They would have used the paint without mixing water in which will result in more mess at the banner and at the washing area; they would not have marked out the area for the children and the banner will end up badly composed, the time for the paint to dry could have been left out of the schedule’s calculations…) I too, am grateful for my experience in doing projects at Nanyang Polytechnic and at DigiPen: it was through these grueling projects that I have how to plan this banner exercise so well.

Right after I returned from Sichuan, I was roped in my father (Centre Director of Care Corner Family Service Centre Woodlands) to be a volunteer film director and cameraman for two short promo videos for an upcoming corporate retreat that the centre wanted to produce. My past experiences came in handy once more as I sketched out storyboards and blocked out everyone’s positions.

On the shoot for the first video, due to the drizzling weather, I was forced to rush through the scenes, which, on hindsight, sharpened my improvising skills. During the editing and compositing process of this film, I had to make do with the little footage that I have and piece them together to form something comprehensible and presentable. With that many limitations, it was as though I as doing yet another school project. It makes me feel that the many specifications given for our school assignments are indeed adequate preparation for dealing with the restrictions that non-school work tend to have as well.

The second video gave me more flexibility as it was indoors – free from the constraints of bad weather. The staff were cooperative, and thanks to them, I was allowed more re-shoots and had the opportunity to experiment with more angles. It was also easier to relay instructions indoors rather than outdoors, and having learned from the previous shoot, I was also more able to relaying instructions that the amateur actors can understand. Learning to cope in group projects and getting along well with people in school was really necessary in working out of school too.

In the end, everyone enjoyed our time together. When the editing was done, the video was shown during the company’s corporate devotion. I received feedback from both my father and his staff that the audience were truly entertained and laughed a lot, so much so that all of the other centres and branches of the company started asking Woodlands Centre more about the activities that will take place during the retreat. Everyone got very excited and enthusiastic after seeing the promo videos.

I am very glad that my skills gained from Nanyang Polytechnic and DigiPen were able to help out those around me and bring joy to everyone it reaches to. This further convinces me about the beauty of the media and arts.

I am very blessed to be given my pair of skillful hands and my creative mind. I hope to become even more skillful and creative through my next three years at DigiPen.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

i do want to get married...

Image hosted by
Listening: Wonder Girls - Nobody
Watching: The Little Nyonya Episode 33-34

Ah Ma was watching that popular 小娘惹 show. We got it on DVD from my cousins, who downloaded and burnt it for her. ALL HAIL THE INTERNET.

Then Ah Ma got depressed at the final episode. Because the fake grandma character Xiang Yun was sick and dying, saying that she wished she could see her granddaughter get married. But it being a dumb drama, she didn't make it. Ah Ma was depressed like this. She says she too probably won't get to attend my wedding and goes a bit teary.

What. Imma not going to get a boyfriend just to make her happy. That's not really possible. ~_~

So, I pray that she would live long enough. Hopefully several years more until I get married. XDD

Sunday, May 24, 2009

Red Chord

Image hosted by
Listening: Jars of Clay - Love Song for a Savior
Reading: The Case for Faith by Lee Strobel

Rahab had been a prostitute, but she had faith and welcomed the spies. So she wasn't killed with the people who disobeyed.
           — Hebrews 11:31 [CEV]

I was reading Lee Strobel's The Case for Faith during our cell group's solitude. The title of the chapter I was reading is "God Isn't Worthy of Worship If He Kills Innocent Children". I won't write down my wall of text about what the chapter was about. But generally: Even if a person was born in a place where there is no God, if he wants to reach out to her, he will find a way. (Anyway, about the children: if children die before the age of accountability, they will go to heaven. So it's really better to kill them quickly before they learn how to do anything evil.)

They killed everyone, men and women, young and old, everyone except Rahab and the others in her house. They even killed every cow, sheep, and donkey.

Joshua said to the two men who had been spies, " Rahab kept you safe when I sent you to Jericho. We promised to protect her and her family, and we will keep that promise. Now go into her house and bring them out."

The two men went into Rahab's house and brought her out, along with her father and mother, her brothers, and her other relatives. Rahab and her family had to stay in a place just outside the Israelite army camp. But later they were allowed to live among the Israelites, and her descendants still do. The Israelites took the silver and gold and the things made of bronze and iron and put them with the rest of the treasure that was kept at the LORD's house. Finally, they set fire to Jericho and everything in it.

           — Joshua 6:21-25 [CEV]

So that night, I took this red scarf that I originally made for my cosplaying (as Toujou Aya) and tied it to my room window. >.<

/random Jesus' ancestry is full of foreigners.

Salmon the father of Boaz, whose mother was Rahab,
Boaz the father of Obed, whose mother was Ruth,
Obed the father of Jesse,
and Jesse the father of King David.

           — Matthew 1:5-6 [NIV]

Monday, February 16, 2009

Baccano! is good, essays are bad.

Image hosted by
Listening: 周迅 - 外面
Watching: Scrapped Princess Episode 1

I have been wanting to write about some things for a long time, but haven't been able to sit down. Well, now I have. I guess I'll recount in reverse chronological order:

Sunday, 15 Feb
My parents are back from Malaysia. My dad said that his sister, has been having dreams of my dead grandpa (their father). In one of those dreams, he told her "You are useless." And when she told my grandma about that dream, my grandma agreed with her. I feel like slapping my grandma on the back for a job well done, but I held back out of "respect" for my aunt. XDD (Like hey, she was in Malaysia, my aunt is in Malaysia, and wtf...? You guys ate reunion dinner without her, and left her alone in her apartment? WTF. Don't you know how lonely she is?)

Saturday, 14 Feb
Baccano! is good. I am in love with Claire Stanfield. So cute.

Friday, 13 Feb
My lecturer kept harping on my inability to look people in the face. (It hurts to look at faces, for me, and for some other autists and etc.) And on Albert's voice (English is not his mother tongue - you should hear him speak Bahasa). Acting module. Arrrggh we know our weaknesses already, stop telling us about it. Albert is so cute. When we look through they videos, I can't stand the sight of myself and want to look away. Bert can't stand the sound of his voice and wants to stuff his ears.

Thursday, 12 Feb
I would smack Japher on the head (oh, I already did) if he wasn't a fifteen-year-old brat. Saying that he hates all "retarded" people. He better not be serious when he says he wants to burn his brother (who has Asperger's).

Tuesday, 10 Feb
A person spoke something, which frightened me a little.

Monday, 09 Feb
I had a dream. There were three birds/winged creatures. Their time passes differently from mine. I met the teenage them first, then the children them, then the adult ones. They were males and quite human. One was yellow, one was green, one was red.

Sunday, 08 Feb
Second week of no children ministry duty, and I miss my kids terribly. Uwaahhh. I miss not wrestling with them who are always biting/clawing/groping/hugging/dancing/head-butting/pulling hair/touching my face/asking to be carried.

Saturday, 07 Feb
The chalet for CJ's 21st birthday. I bought him a Gurren Lagann cup!! *is proud of present*

Thursday, 05 Feb
I amaze myself. I woke up early enough to send Cheri-sama off to Perth.

Wednesday, 04 Feb
I went out to take photos for an assignment. I scared myself. It seems that I am more afraid of people than I thought. I feel ball-ess. (Ughh, oh yea, I had none to begin with.)

Tuesday, 03 Feb
My body has gotten quite horrible. It appears that I am now allergic to certain kinds of artificial flavourings. It didn't use to be like that. Anyway, things like that inflicts the status: Hyperactive on me, which, while fun, is horrify. I can't concentrate on anything at all, because there are over 9000 thoughts/smells/sounds/memories/senses going through my mind. And I also can't sleep at all, because there are over 9000 thoughts/smells/sounds/memories/senses going through my mind. Even honey triggers that status. And I only took 5 spoons!!

Sunday, 01 Feb
I miss my kids. I want to see the adorable girl who is so like me in the Attention Deficit Disorder sense. (Missing the H bit, thank God.) She's too young for doctor's to tell, but I also think she has Angelman's Syndrome, by the way. Which of course, buffs her with 4x Cuteness.

Saturday, 31 Jan
Mahjong = awesome.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009


Image hosted by
Listening: Relient K - Devastation and Reform
Watching: Baccano! Episode 3
Reading: Usagi Drop Chapter 12

I discovered, I am still very uncomfortable with talking to people one-on-one in a room where no one else is around. It is quite weird na. Not that I don't enjoy it. I don't mind company. I like people. Just that, sit-beside-you-to-talk is weird. I don't mind physical contact, really. It is the verbal questions I mind.

The last I time remembered something like that was like... five years ago in Sec 3. (In Poly, you won't be in a room with only one other person, hardly.)

Thank goodness though, that person is not a girl asking me questions about me. I don't like questions like that. Because I hear them too often? Browser strategy games make better conversation topics.

Mmmrrgggh. I think I am just being an ass.

And I ate prawn omelette on Saturday, thinking it'll be fine. Like hey, if I get a reddish nose/ears/neck, it will wear off after chinese new year right?

WRONG. The prawns... they were, very, very fresh. If I ate anymore, asthma~!! *sucks on brown inhaler*

Greedy me.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009


Image hosted by
Listening: Relient K - Up and Up

Joanne said she wished she could be a boy. Because her two guy friends are staying over, together, again.

I laughed. Laughed. Because it was really funny.

Dear sister, you have said something I have been praying to God about, for the last 11- no, 12 years.


Monday, January 12, 2009

Not Even Wrong

Image hosted by
Listening: Epik High - Fan

Title: Not Even Wrong: Adventures in Autism
Author: Paul Collins
Call Number: 618.92

(It is not a book review. It is me taking notes before I return the book to the library.)

The first recorded autist was probably Peter the Wild Boy. He was dumped by his parents for not being able to talk. He was found in the wild at 12 years old and taken to King George.

The dude who came out with the Linnaean taxonomy classified the kid as a different species all together, Homo ferus. Imagine the lulz if there are really two distinct species of humans. All the Homo sapiens sapiens would kill themselves sooner or later in frustration and become extinct and the world will be filled with Homo ferus.

......... *bursts out laughing on the floor*

Nothing to do with the book, I answered "Anne" for the Sally-Anne Test. Ahahahaha. Oops. But okay, I changed my answer later.

A survey of a thousand British parents of autistic children in comparison to that of neurotypical children showed that there were double the number of engineering fathers, a hell lot more with jobs involving science and accounting (solo-ist type jobs), and quadruple the number of artists. At Cambridge, science major students have autism in their family six times more than literature major students. WhatifImarryanengineer -Kolkolkolkolkol

That does explain why there are most autists nowadays. Dong dong dong dong... There are more engineers and matheticians and programmers now than before, no?

Computers came from a dude who was suspected to have Asperger's. The author gave a talk at Microsoft, and the programmer guys were on their notebooks, looking at the screen, instead of watching him. They were watching a live podcast of his talk, even with him right in front of them. Epic-ness.

I understand that bit well. It is hard to look at people. Like it hurts. Ummm, my secondary schoolmates can attest to it, I think. They were complaining to me about it last week. XDD

And regarding savantism, there is an interesting explanation. When a kid is about 2 years old, his/her brain forms neural connections at an imba speed, and many of these connections are kinda "redundant" or hetare. Then at 3 years old, it's pruning time!! Chop chop chop. So lucky autistic guys with savants get pruned differently, and therefore maintain their rare neural connections, enabling them with hax hearing/artistic/calculation/etc skills. I think it also comes with screwed up senses of touch/hearing/smell/whatever.

And here ends fun note-taking. Also, I am NOT autistic. I only have adhd. And certain characteristic of the autism spectrum. Na nana nananana.

Other authors I plan to check out: Thinking in Pictures by Temple Grandin (what a cool name), Uta Frith and Simon Baron-Cohen. As usual, I might not really do so if they are not tl;dr enough. I have a short attention span.