Showing posts with label talk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label talk. Show all posts

Saturday, December 03, 2011

So i/we learnt something about ourselves today. Night.

Image hosted by Photobucket.comListening: Gym Class Heroes (ft. Adam Levine) - Stereo Hearts
Reading: Outaka Shinobu - Magi: Labyrinth of Magic

A big step in self-discovery, yay.

When we are stressed, we start to combine.

And i am freaking out here. I am suddenly a person i am not. I am suddenly in this body. Feeling this flesh. I/we am feeling pains and emptyness i am not used to feeling.

Shit shit shit stop combining. I like you, i like us sharing a body, but i don’t want to be you. I don’t want to keep hurting you. Fuck, i am sorry.

Calm the fuck down. Calm down. Go back, do the game homework. Oh look, my friend’s online, talk to him. No don’t. I’m scared here. For you/us. It won’t help, would it?

Oh hey! Cool. We’re back. To being separate souls. Ahahahaha. That was stupid. Yea it’s dumb. We need to stop being stressed. This needs to stop happening. We’re okay after typing it out!

Omigod, now i sound like i’m desperate for someone to hear me. Acknowledge me.

Aren’t you?

Wednesday, August 31, 2011

I(We) make awesome character references

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Listening: Maroon 5 - Moves like Jagger
Reading: Wakaki Tamiki - The World God Only Knows Chapter 155
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I met up with my counselors today. According to them, some time in my childhood, something traumatic (?) took place which caused my soul to be fragmented, creating a split personality, making it such that we are two souls inhibiting this one body.

We sound pretty awesome, I think. If we were in a/an manga/anime, we would join the ranks of Wanijima Akito/Agito, Allelujah/Hallelujah Haptism and Ryougi Shiki.

But since this is real-life, what we have to do is to have me take back the fragment of my soul and become one again.

See what I mean? Awesome character reference.

(On a side note, neither of us are very willing to become together. We like our coexistence very much. I mean, hey, we’ve been living like this for more than a decade! How to combine? We can’t imagine that. Not at all.)

Sunday, July 18, 2010

What is wrong with daydreams?

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Listening: Suneohair - Sakasama Bridge
Watching: Birdy the Mighty Decode - The Cipher
Reading: Nononono - Chapter 60
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I already understand, that fantasy and make-believe is a form of escapism from real life. But why is it wrong? Perhaps I should take it up to 11 and become a resident of Arakawa.

Everyone daydreams too, just each differing in their levels and type of imagination. Besides, if people like us don't daydream,
Who will write stories?
Who will draw illustrations?
Who will author manga?
Who will design characters?
Who will plan storyboards?
Who will shoot movies?
Who will animate films?
Who will make games?


As a parent, I feel sad that my children/creation's existence is being so definitively rejected. I am more God-like then I know, sometimes.

Wednesday, June 16, 2010

Somehow I was proposed to...

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Reading: The World God Only Knows - Chapter 102
Random Quote: Can you don't go home? — A kid at the SCC
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... by a seven-year-old boy. It went like this:
Boy: Teacher, are you married?
Me: (chuckling) Ah... No, not yet.
Girl: He want to marry you.
Me: Ehh?! Ummm... (turns to boy) You want to marry me?
Boy: (looks away silently)
~___~ And, thus, I have collected another manga-panel-like situation.

I was convinced, for the first time, that things that happen in a shoujo manga can happen in real life. Boy is born with a weak body. He cannot overexert himself: walking too long, running too fast, laughing too loud, getting too exited, any of those or more could get him sent to hospital. His uncle has to carry to him school, because he is too weak to cover the distance from his home with his own two feet.

He has no mother. Why? I don't know. But I know that for this reason, he is easily attached to any woman who seems nice enough. He would hug her and hold her. (That's why the teachers tell his father to clip his nails lest he will scratch them unknowingly.)

Many of the kids in the SCC are from disadvantaged families: poor, single parent, or both. Even for the short amount of time spent there, I could tell, that those children who are missing a mother, are much more sticky and physically affectionate to me, as if to fill in the space left behind by the absent mother. I am not physically a man, or I would have been able to see the empty space caused by an absent father by those who lack one as well.

Sheesh, parents. Please learn to copulate responsibly.


NOTE: I am working part-time, teaching drawing/art at a Student Care Centre where parents who don't have maids park their kids for a day so they can go to work.

Sunday, June 06, 2010

RAAAGE~!! (Clients are stupid. Always.)

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Watching: Alvin and the Chipmunks
Reading: Clients From Hell
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So I emailed someone who previously invited me to apply to a job at her company, for a part-time job in the holidays.

[insert correspondence here]

She says:
I will be an "intern". She will pay me $500 per month. I will have to get my butt down to Kallang from 0930 to 1830 every Monday to Friday.




Like, seriously? I have a Diploma you know. And even intern saikang warriors at Lucas get paid more than that. I should be getting more than this miserable MacDonalds pay.

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

and He speaks

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Listening: Joey's cello and metronome
Reading: Shibatora Chapter 26
Random Quote: But everyone who calls on the name of the Lord will be saved. — Acts 2:21 [NLT]
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Believe in me and you will be saved.

Is this Your reply to me...?

Sunday, September 06, 2009

need more STR stats

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Listening: A R Rahman - Jai Ho
Reading: sonic.wikia.com
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*sprouts a chain of vulgarities in english/hokkien/chinese/malay*

I. Am. Irritated.

1 - SN

Today, is probably one of the most hectic days in my serving of the Special Needs kids. Joseph tries to play with the normal kids: they shout "siao arh" at him. Jia Hui is all mine today. Joseph doesn't like sharing me so he pulls my hair and steals my specs three times more often than usual. Shivam screamed about. Chain reaction. Elisha cries/whines loudly. Joshua is about to go off too. Everyone busy with the autistic boys, the ADHD one and the Downs Syndrome one and the girl is left to me. Joash disturbs Jia Hui. Joseph breaks/tears puzzle pieces. Joseph and Joash both climb on me. Jia Hui leaves to find more puzzles. I chase her, Joseph breaks more puzzles. I scold him, he laughs, Joash scolds him.

Bah. Whatever it is, any first-timer to SN will get scared off and swear never to return here.

That's what I really hate about SN. I don't dislike the kids, they are cute =3 But I dislike how other people do not want to serve with them. After being with them for 2 plus years, I can see why. It's hard to the fruits of our labour. Our kids don't respond. They are violent. They are noisy. They don't even acknowledge your existence. The don't seem to get better. They are always as dependent as ever.

I cannot help but think that whenever other leaders look at our corner of screaming, "misbehaving" kids, they think something along the lines of "Thank God our kids are not like that". But guys, we are all women here. We are not that strong. Our boys getting bigger in size, and their hormones are functioning like any normal boy their age, even if their minds do not. What can we do?

God, I need to rely on you for strength. But please, also send some guys our way. We have been asking for guys, for the past years, and some have come, stayed, and left. Others come and left instantly. I am disappointed. I know it is not easy to serve these kids. That's why, God, send someone strong. I petition sincerely.

(On a related note: Divorce rates amongst couples with Special Needs children are really high. And, DUH, it is the mother who ends up raising the children. ALL YOU GUYS HAVE LESS BALLS THAN US GIRLS.)

2 - GB

My timetable changed. Third revision. All my lessons are now in the afternoon. Even if I am able to teleport, I have only 1 hour to spend. So I cannot serve GB anymore.

What, maybe I'm not worthy to be an officer. I'm pretty weak of a person, that much I know.



For now, I'll look forward to carrying my photocopier puzzle-tracked mind girl in two weeks time. Only one day, and I miss GKidz already.

Sunday, August 16, 2009

i had a good early birthday

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Listening: Iwasaki Tarou - SOUL-EATER(SO SCANDALOUS)
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Thanks to Junting, Mel, Glory, Hui hui and Kenneth. ^ ^

In a few days, I'll be 21 months old. So says my parents.

Thursday, July 16, 2009

Scholarship Essay ($5000 for 2 semesters)

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Listening: Kirk Franklin/tobyMac - Let It Glow
Reading: needmoney.doc (LOL)
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The curriculum at DigiPen Institute of Technology involves rigorous foundational coursework reinforced by a project-based learning approach that allows students to apply their skills and knowledge in an industry-like environment. Describe a time when you have successfully applied something you learned (on your own, from work, or from a class) in a creative, artistic, or academic endeavor.

The first time I learned that colours have emotions was during a Sunday morning, doing my duties in church, through the hands of a 7-year-old boy with Down’s Syndrome. On happy days, Jesus was green and the crippled man was yellow. On sick days, the shepherd was brown and the sheep were blue. On angry tantrum days, Mary was red and infant Jesus was black.

It was an epiphany to find out that there was actually truth and reason behind the colours artists use to symbolize certain emotions to convey the mood of their pieces. It was a real life lesson in colour theory and a teaching in how closely art relates to real life.

Going on this route of an artist and designer has been one of the greatest changing points in my life. I have loved drawing and computers since my childhood, and I choose to not let my passion stay as a hobby, but seek to improve myself by taking a Diploma in Digital Media Design.

Since then, I have become the unofficial marketing director of whatever events that my non-artists friends have planned. I did up posters and websites, in the process of which I learned more about working as a designer.

Recently, I went on a community service trip to Dujiangyan in Sichuan for the survivors of the 2008 earthquake. One of the activities we did was to have the children paint a huge banner, stamping their palm prints on the cloth and writing down their dreams. In preparation for it, I bought poster paints, plates and other materials. On the day itself, I helped in drawing guidelines and markings on the banner and in coordinating the children as to where to print on the banner. Due to the excitement of the children and the sheer number of them, it was slightly chaotic situation, leading to a stressful experience for my group. Thankfully, the banner was completed beautifully in the end without any major problems.

It was only during the debrief that I realized how smooth things went on. There had been two groups assigned to two different camps of temporary housings, and the other group’s banner exercise had been more chaotic than ours. Both groups were very grateful for my advice and guidance as we realized that the banner exercise would not have been that successful. (They would have used the paint without mixing water in which will result in more mess at the banner and at the washing area; they would not have marked out the area for the children and the banner will end up badly composed, the time for the paint to dry could have been left out of the schedule’s calculations…) I too, am grateful for my experience in doing projects at Nanyang Polytechnic and at DigiPen: it was through these grueling projects that I have how to plan this banner exercise so well.

Right after I returned from Sichuan, I was roped in my father (Centre Director of Care Corner Family Service Centre Woodlands) to be a volunteer film director and cameraman for two short promo videos for an upcoming corporate retreat that the centre wanted to produce. My past experiences came in handy once more as I sketched out storyboards and blocked out everyone’s positions.

On the shoot for the first video, due to the drizzling weather, I was forced to rush through the scenes, which, on hindsight, sharpened my improvising skills. During the editing and compositing process of this film, I had to make do with the little footage that I have and piece them together to form something comprehensible and presentable. With that many limitations, it was as though I as doing yet another school project. It makes me feel that the many specifications given for our school assignments are indeed adequate preparation for dealing with the restrictions that non-school work tend to have as well.

The second video gave me more flexibility as it was indoors – free from the constraints of bad weather. The staff were cooperative, and thanks to them, I was allowed more re-shoots and had the opportunity to experiment with more angles. It was also easier to relay instructions indoors rather than outdoors, and having learned from the previous shoot, I was also more able to relaying instructions that the amateur actors can understand. Learning to cope in group projects and getting along well with people in school was really necessary in working out of school too.

In the end, everyone enjoyed our time together. When the editing was done, the video was shown during the company’s corporate devotion. I received feedback from both my father and his staff that the audience were truly entertained and laughed a lot, so much so that all of the other centres and branches of the company started asking Woodlands Centre more about the activities that will take place during the retreat. Everyone got very excited and enthusiastic after seeing the promo videos.

I am very glad that my skills gained from Nanyang Polytechnic and DigiPen were able to help out those around me and bring joy to everyone it reaches to. This further convinces me about the beauty of the media and arts.

I am very blessed to be given my pair of skillful hands and my creative mind. I hope to become even more skillful and creative through my next three years at DigiPen.

Saturday, July 04, 2009

i do want to get married...

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Listening: Wonder Girls - Nobody
Watching: The Little Nyonya Episode 33-34
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Ah Ma was watching that popular 小娘惹 show. We got it on DVD from my cousins, who downloaded and burnt it for her. ALL HAIL THE INTERNET.

Then Ah Ma got depressed at the final episode. Because the fake grandma character Xiang Yun was sick and dying, saying that she wished she could see her granddaughter get married. But it being a dumb drama, she didn't make it. Ah Ma was depressed like this. She says she too probably won't get to attend my wedding and goes a bit teary.

What. Imma not going to get a boyfriend just to make her happy. That's not really possible. ~_~

So, I pray that she would live long enough. Hopefully several years more until I get married. XDD

Monday, February 16, 2009

Baccano! is good, essays are bad.

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Listening: 周迅 - 外面
Watching: Scrapped Princess Episode 1
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I have been wanting to write about some things for a long time, but haven't been able to sit down. Well, now I have. I guess I'll recount in reverse chronological order:

Sunday, 15 Feb
My parents are back from Malaysia. My dad said that his sister, has been having dreams of my dead grandpa (their father). In one of those dreams, he told her "You are useless." And when she told my grandma about that dream, my grandma agreed with her. I feel like slapping my grandma on the back for a job well done, but I held back out of "respect" for my aunt. XDD (Like hey, she was in Malaysia, my aunt is in Malaysia, and wtf...? You guys ate reunion dinner without her, and left her alone in her apartment? WTF. Don't you know how lonely she is?)

Saturday, 14 Feb
Baccano! is good. I am in love with Claire Stanfield. So cute.

Friday, 13 Feb
My lecturer kept harping on my inability to look people in the face. (It hurts to look at faces, for me, and for some other autists and etc.) And on Albert's voice (English is not his mother tongue - you should hear him speak Bahasa). Acting module. Arrrggh we know our weaknesses already, stop telling us about it. Albert is so cute. When we look through they videos, I can't stand the sight of myself and want to look away. Bert can't stand the sound of his voice and wants to stuff his ears.

Thursday, 12 Feb
I would smack Japher on the head (oh, I already did) if he wasn't a fifteen-year-old brat. Saying that he hates all "retarded" people. He better not be serious when he says he wants to burn his brother (who has Asperger's).

Tuesday, 10 Feb
A person spoke something, which frightened me a little.

Monday, 09 Feb
I had a dream. There were three birds/winged creatures. Their time passes differently from mine. I met the teenage them first, then the children them, then the adult ones. They were males and quite human. One was yellow, one was green, one was red.

Sunday, 08 Feb
Second week of no children ministry duty, and I miss my kids terribly. Uwaahhh. I miss not wrestling with them who are always biting/clawing/groping/hugging/dancing/head-butting/pulling hair/touching my face/asking to be carried.

Saturday, 07 Feb
The chalet for CJ's 21st birthday. I bought him a Gurren Lagann cup!! *is proud of present*

Thursday, 05 Feb
I amaze myself. I woke up early enough to send Cheri-sama off to Perth.

Wednesday, 04 Feb
I went out to take photos for an assignment. I scared myself. It seems that I am more afraid of people than I thought. I feel ball-ess. (Ughh, oh yea, I had none to begin with.)

Tuesday, 03 Feb
My body has gotten quite horrible. It appears that I am now allergic to certain kinds of artificial flavourings. It didn't use to be like that. Anyway, things like that inflicts the status: Hyperactive on me, which, while fun, is horrify. I can't concentrate on anything at all, because there are over 9000 thoughts/smells/sounds/memories/senses going through my mind. And I also can't sleep at all, because there are over 9000 thoughts/smells/sounds/memories/senses going through my mind. Even honey triggers that status. And I only took 5 spoons!!

Sunday, 01 Feb
I miss my kids. I want to see the adorable girl who is so like me in the Attention Deficit Disorder sense. (Missing the H bit, thank God.) She's too young for doctor's to tell, but I also think she has Angelman's Syndrome, by the way. Which of course, buffs her with 4x Cuteness.

Saturday, 31 Jan
Mahjong = awesome.

Wednesday, January 28, 2009

Prawns

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Listening: Relient K - Devastation and Reform
Watching: Baccano! Episode 3
Reading: Usagi Drop Chapter 12
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I discovered, I am still very uncomfortable with talking to people one-on-one in a room where no one else is around. It is quite weird na. Not that I don't enjoy it. I don't mind company. I like people. Just that, sit-beside-you-to-talk is weird. I don't mind physical contact, really. It is the verbal questions I mind.

The last I time remembered something like that was like... five years ago in Sec 3. (In Poly, you won't be in a room with only one other person, hardly.)

Thank goodness though, that person is not a girl asking me questions about me. I don't like questions like that. Because I hear them too often? Browser strategy games make better conversation topics.

Mmmrrgggh. I think I am just being an ass.


And I ate prawn omelette on Saturday, thinking it'll be fine. Like hey, if I get a reddish nose/ears/neck, it will wear off after chinese new year right?

WRONG. The prawns... they were, very, very fresh. If I ate anymore, asthma~!! *sucks on brown inhaler*

Greedy me.

Tuesday, January 13, 2009

苦笑

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Listening: Relient K - Up and Up
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Joanne said she wished she could be a boy. Because her two guy friends are staying over, together, again.


I laughed. Laughed. Because it was really funny.

Dear sister, you have said something I have been praying to God about, for the last 11- no, 12 years.

XDD

Wednesday, July 18, 2007

I don't get this lovey-emotion-thingy

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Listening: Yellowcard - Two weeks from Twenty
Watching: Gurren Lagann Episode 16
Reading: D.Gray Man Chapter 125
Random Quote: Tragically, as many as 9625 out of every 10,000 individuals may be neurotypical. - Institute for the Study of the Neurologically Typical
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My sister is in love now and she cannot take it, cannot control herself anymore, cannot just ignore and must be attached to him, even if he is not a Christian. Weird feelings. BAAAHHHH. Neurotypicals. Pfftt.


I went out with a group of Japanese exchange students on Saturday. It was fun, especially treating them to Carrot Cake and Chin Chow at a hawker centre. They were like "what is this?" And I drew a carrot and grass for them. They went "wow". Heh.

All Singaporean guys should learn from the Japanese guys. Hide and Satoshi told me "You are very pretty". And being unused to being told this by another guy, I stoned for several seconds, before and bowing and saying "arigatou" profusely. =__= It is weird, because Singaporean guys never say that a girl is pretty unless they are going after them, whereas the Japanese guys do. And because of that, I have no idea how to react when being told I am pretty. =__=

Hide wanted to give me a small plushie rabbit too. I rejected it because I'm not used to presents either. (Okaayyy, I admit that I am shy!!) Damn me, was it rude to refuse it? Haha. Chinese have a custom of pushing presents: "you take lar" "no it's for you" &mdash that bit I am very Chinese (despite language impairment). Not a fan of plush toys really. =PP


More art dayo:

Bwwaah. Arm position is wrong.

Saturday, June 02, 2007

New comp yay

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Listening: Youth Alive - Can't live a day
Watching: Darker than Black Episode 09
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One day, one glorious day,
I'll sing your praises in the presences of angels.
Until that glorious day,
I give my life to you.


Saru is dead tired. So here's a brief recap.

Friday, Late Morning - Lunch
I had lunch with Joan and Meiyun and Joyce and Xueqi. I haven't talked a load of crap with the former three for such a looong time, due to their IAP, and it was fun being with them again. They're still in their usual, extremely horny and high state, and always treating me like a little girl still. -.- I enjoyed their company though.

Friday, Afternoon - Drawing
WE HAD A HOT FEMALE MODEL!! Yesh, for once, a girl model. She has a very good figure, mwaha.

Friday, Evening - Youth Alive RADICAL CONFERENCE 07
It was fun!! I went with Yining to his church. I have never before been so appreciative of Max Pavilion. Their auditorium is as small as Omega3, the Timothy Club room. But their church, being small, are a bunch of really warm people. They have a homely feeling to it, kinda different from FCBC. (I still love my kids though.) If they were to go by the phrases that our church has (Go Deep, Look Far, Ask Big), they are probably at the "Go Deep" part now. That's good. ^ ^ I pray that God will bless their church.

And oh, Yining like dragged me to all of his cell members, and asked them, "How old you think she is?" And they all answered something along the lines of 14, 15, 16. No one guess that I am a third-year poly student. Ahh crap. Is that a good or a bad thing? Am I not suppose to behave that much like a child?

Friday, Night - New Computer!
Yay my new wife came when I was out!! (Earlier than expected.) The is like a damn big-ass 22-inch 1680x1050 pixels. Amazing crap. Love it. Fixed it until like 0300.

Saturday, Afternoon - Transferring files
I like spent the whole day transferring files from my ex-wife to my new one. In two 1GB USB Flash Drives. And what's worse was, the USB ports at the front weren't working, so I had to keep poking it in the back. Annoying like crap. But I played some Granado Espada. =DD And zomg, the graphics for Granado Espada on this comp and screen is like, God-like. I found out that my CPU tower has like, fives fans. Damn imba. (Pardon the use of gaming language.)


So that's the summary. I only posted now, because I saved it as draft and was lazy to edit until now.

Wednesday, May 16, 2007

first time eating claypot rice?

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Listening: FictionJunction YUUKA - Yakusoku
Watching: Darker than Black Episode 6
Reading: One Piece 456
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Today we had outdoor drawing lessons in Chinatown. And Mr Brian Hladin likes the sketches I drew of the David Club children last Sunday. XDD

After that, some who had drawing, a few who had FYPJ and two who had IA all trooped over to Outram Park MRT to eat at the Claypot Rice stall ran by Hamster's mum. 17 of us in total.

It is funny, but I've never eaten claypot rice before. I found it a little too salty. ~ _ ~ But I loved the chicken. =DD Ate a lot of it.

Chinese people are really funny/weird. Because there were so many of us, we didn't want to let Hamster's mum treat all of us. And they refused to tell us how much the meal cost either. So we each forked out $3 and chased Hamster about trying to give her the money.

Chased their whole family (two aunts plus one mother plus Hamster herself) trying to give them money. I've never seen people running away from money before. -.-

I asked Dad;
Saru: If you own a food stall, and your kid comes bringing a group of his/her classmates over to eat, would you charge them?
Dad: No I won't.
Saru: Ehh??! Why?
Dad: Because they are your friends arh.
Saru: Ehh? I still don't get it...
Dad: Well, they are your friends, so I would like to give them a treat.
Saru: Ahh... Then if they keep wanting to give you money?
Dad: Then as much as possible, I'll try to refuse them...
Saru: Why?
Dad: Maybe it's Chinese custom or for face reasons, but it isn't right to charge your friends because they're like guests...
Ahh oh no. Did we do something wrong to Hamster's family then? Chasing them around to give them money... ._. (It was fun playing catching like that though.)

Arrhhh heck care. =3 Bwahahahaha.

Ahhh. Speaking about Daddy. You can find his photo here. Rock bottom of the list. Looks quite retarded.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

"You should be a kindergarten school teacher"

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Listening: Kubota Osamu - Aria de Coimbra
Playing: Granado Espada (Closed Beta)
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And yes, that was what Lee Yeung said.

=____=

No no no no no Saru doesn't want that!! I want my own kids, not other people's kids. No no no no no~~~ But then Yong Ming said that if that were the case, all the kids would probably go missing or something. So they decided I'll be better off owning a pet shop since animals can be put in cages whereas kids can't be.

But what I found was most strange was that, he said "You have a certain kind of love that is different from other people and others around you can feel it as well."

O___O Saru doesn't know what love is!! I can't tell the difference between liking Romie (dog) and liking Yong Ming (classmate, 师父). And liking Lao Pa (father) and liking Lee Yeung (classmate, advisor). Hmm okay maybe I respect Lao Pa a lot more, and disturb him a lot more as well. Though well, I do know that there are different levels of "like", different levels of "closeness" and different levels of "respect". Like my "like" level for Ant (sister) is the maximum high, but my "closeness" level with Lao Ma is higher than that of Ant's.

So I protest and say: "Nooo~~ I don't know how to love one~" Daryl (or was it Lee Yeung? I forgot na) says: "You don't know how to love. 废话!!" Mweeh. Scary.

So there, it is strange, don't you think? That I am seen as "showing love" even though I don't know anything about it at all. When I say that, I mean that if I am to be separated from the people I like a lot, I wouldn't mind at all. It feels bad, like I am lying, when I meet somebody I haven't seen for a long time and I say that "I miss you" because I don't. Though, I'll be happy to play and laugh and talk with them.


I find that the way people treat me resembles the way I treat Romie. Like:
  • Romie is useless and can do nothing. Same for me.

  • Romie and tags me about everywhere and if I stay up late (like now) he stays up too. Saru follows friends around if they want they company.

  • Romie doesn't betray people. Saru doesn't... well at least I can't think of any incident. My memory gets wonky often, so I won't know.

  • If Romie is happy, he shows it; if he is sad he shows it. Same as Saru. Saru is too lazy to bother to bother acting happy if I am pissed off.

  • People will like Romie and play cuddle him even though Romie hasn't done anything for them. Uweeahhh people play with me too. Especially Joyce. And I play with people too. XDD

  • Romie trusts people and accepts them for what they are like. Saru too. I know CJ and Lee Yeung and Ham all tell me that LS is just acting so that we would let her off or something, but somehow... Neh, I don't believe it. Not like I don't trust them though, just that I don't wanna doubt LS.

Things that I am not like Romie though, is that I am a lot less emotionally sensitive than he is. Romie can tell when a person is happy (and be playful), when a person is angry (and flee) and when a person is sad (he will stay beside them and be quiet). Saru is too stupid to sense that. Romie also misses me when I am away for a few days, and he wouldn't eat breakfast or dinner properly for that few days. Stupid dog na. If I die before him, he'll die the following week.


Oh it is late. I shall go and sleep now!! LaoPa is bringing us all the Waraku to eat later after church!! XDD Yayness. I've been waiting for that for months. ^ ^ Mweehee.

Wednesday, February 07, 2007

ASDASDASDASDASD

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Listening: Hajime Chitose - Kataritsugu Koto
Reading: Job 5: 17-27 [CEV]
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Nope that wasn't just some random left-to-right hitting of keys on my keyboard. Search for "ASD" on Wikipedia and it's one of those things there.

Speaking about that, I just checked myself against the list of things there. I scored 5/8 for Social, 4/11 for Language, 1/5 for the imagination/adherence (yayness, lowest one heh) and 2/4 for Sensory. I wonder if I've gotten any better.

Let's see, today we talked a lot during dinner. It was fun since I got to know everyone better. ^ ^ Maybe except for Lychee, since I've been hearing her talk for a long time. Not like the rest are less talkative, but they just speak of serious stuff less often.

Lee Yeung's question just reinforced the fact of how abstract "love" is to me. And I think crap oh noes I want to have children so much, but what happens if I am as apathetic as I am now? What if I don't understand why my children feel a certain way? I can't always go to my mother and ask "How will a normal person think?" - right? And what is my husband is frustrated with my stupidity and inability to experience and comprehend "normal" human emotions? Will he still be a good father?

How do I know what is "love" neeways? I like a lot of people. I like Hamster CJ Clara Joan Joyce Cheryl LS Lychee Meiyun Amirah Yong Ming Lee Yeung Walter Edmund Daryl Joshua Sarah Li Siong Shihan Adrian Kirsten Jean Xiaojun Jasmine Mayeeeeeeeee Charlotte Sandy LaoPa LaoMa Bu (Ant) Yee Romie. Do those count as "love"?

Lameness. Saru has nothing better to think about. But neeways, God gives me a nice verse (a whole paragraph, actually), so yay I WILL have descendants. XDD

I realize Daryl is very honest, and I really like him. Lychee and Lee Yeung can really talk a lot, and I found myself having something to say, but being unable to speak them out because my response is slow. My brains lags when it comes to social interaction and is at sonicspeed with Mathematics and HTML. (Speaking of Maths, I saw my sister doing differentiation with all the dy and dx... OMG I want to take A Maths again!! RAWR.)

Daryl comments that closing my eyes and walking while holding on the person in front makes me vulnerable. But I don't think so since Lychee and Lee Yeung won't bang me into a lamp post on purpose. So I wonder what he means...

ASD!! It also stands for Auto-Shutdown. Unofficially one of the characteristics of ASD as observed by child psychologist. The habit of when, facing any form of stress which one wants to avoid, justing shutting down to sleep immediately as an effective form of escapism. Escape from thinking about what will happen when I grow older BY SLEEPING!!!

^ _ ^ Oyasumi.

Friday, August 18, 2006

(not-so-)Doomsdayweeks (Part II) - Episode 2

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Listening: Asian Kung-fu Generation - Road Movie
Reading: Joanne's blog =3
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Because Saru was lazy and won't upload my storyboard, Joanne decided to upload it for me. EVERYONE GO SEE HERE~!! XDD

I got an Akatsuki Gundam with Shiranue space pack!! (Click here for technical data info.)

Whaha thank you so much everyone!! For those who gave me the Akatsuki (Zabyaru-taicho, Lychee, Walter, my who, Xue Qi, Leong Wei, Shu Guo, Hui Xian, Hui Ling, Aini... uhh who did I miss out?), the one who gave me 2 Maple A-Cash cards (CJ) and those who signed whatever on the box (too many to write down =x)!

Saru had fun terrorizing everyone with my camera today. I would upload photos, but I have to go off soon. (Yee has been trying to get at the comp the entire time but Ant and me were hogging.) So I'll let you know when I uploaded something!

And I got kissed by Eli (female) today. (On the cheek lar.) Li Siong tried to take a photo of that but he was too slow. Ahah sadness, Lee Yeung says he'll never make it as a tiko old man (or something like that).

And yeps, so sayonara for now. ^ ^ *goes off to shower now*

PS: And go SEE HERE!!! =3